MsEra Günlüğü, 25 Haz 19

Take a few minutes and think about what it means to you to be HAPPY. what does Happy look like to you. How would your everyday life be different if you were HAPPY. Is happy the lack of self loathing— and those loss of a few pounds would make you hate yourself less? I don’t know anything about you other than what I see here— but one thing I know for a fact is that helping someone else who needs help worse than you do is an excellent way to build your own sense of fulfillment and happiness 

Some serious hate for yourself. That’s very unfortunate. I hope you find your way. But hate is the wrong direction, seriously. 

Yeah I hit the wall pretty hard. I’ve been in the gym more often than I was before so seeing that my abs were gone and my weight was higher than it has been since before I went on my first deployment was jarring. I feel like all the work I put into my physique was for nothing. I think I’m going to have to look at how much weight I lifted comparing the weeks. I might feel a little better. I’ve been told I have a skewed version of myself so it might not be as bad as I see it but I can only go off my view. Anywho this issue is nothing new honestly this reaction is probably the most healthy of my past reactions. So that’s a win, and I’ll take it. @Chris yeah I’m motivated a bit I just needed to wallow, get a new gym hat, and find a playlist that helps me sling those heavy weights!! 😜 @kenna thanks for the advice. I think I have a good idea of something’s that make me happy but I just have a problem with my own body and no matter what joy I have as soon as I pass by the mirror and don’t see what I find attractive everything else just goes out of the window. I have that “complacency gets you killed” mindset and me being out of shape is complacency.