Gabbie1018 Günlüğü, 15 Oca 14

Hi Gabbie, I work in HR and deal a lot with personality conflicts, harassment, disabilities, and employee relations in the workplace. Most employers, especially the larger ones, have steps in place for situations that are less than ideal. Depending on the size of your company, they may have an entire department devoted to it or it may just be filtered through an HR generalist. Check your employee handbook (if you have one), consult your Union rep (if you have one), and know your rights as an employee before going into the meeting. Being prepared, knowledgable, assertive (never aggressive), and ready to advocate for yourself is the best way to approach negative situations in the workplace. Also, try to get as much as possible in writing just in case. I hope things work out for the best!  

I feel your pain. I've been in a toxic work environment for the last 9 years, and I can't afford to quit. Good for you for taking action! 

I worry about retaliation especially with performance appraisals coming up soon. I am not the only one that has had concerns I have just waited a long time to address them, Even my co-workers are shocked I haven't talked to someone sooner because I seem to get it the worst. I too need this job but my sanity is at stake. My anxiety level is at an all time high and I am so close to not caring if I keep my job or not that is how bad it is. Thanks for your works of support. It definitely helps. 

All the best to you--my advice is to document everything, include dates. Usually, the "workplace bullies" don't have any documentaiton when they retaliate. Keep us posted! 

Sorry, Gabbie, I know the feeling. I've recently started to absolutely refuse to let someone get to me at work (believe me, she HATES me). I focus on a happy me, my customers, who love to see me smile and hear me say positive things ("have a good day" is not enough for me. I say "You have yourself a pretty darn good day!"). People LOVE that and I get a kick out of their reaction. Everyone wins. People that treat others like crap are miserable on the inside. My way of letting them know they've failed bringing me down is by ignoring them, having a great time at work, have a happy voice, enjoy my co-workers, and make every customer feel special. I do all this genuinely, no faking it. I live for me and my happiness. If I don't take care of me, no one will. Gabbie, I believe it's your turn to smile :)  

Big Hugz, Gabbie. I've been through this and I have to say, it was absolutely horrible. It actually went on for a couple of years. Fortunately, things have changed. I was lucky in the fact that my boss hired an extremely great co-worker. We were then merged into another department and we all got to know each other. Prior to this, it was based on "gossip/hearsay." I absolutely LOVE where I work. My supervisor is exceptional. She takes the time to get to know you, give you opportunities and had the insight to merge everyone. This co-worker was an Angel. We all got to know each other, have fun together, go through good/bad times together and become like a family. I absolutely love every single person in my department, as well as my supervisor. I hope your situation gets better. Take a moment and prepare what you want to say. Think of things that can make it better. Be ready for constructive criticism because when you present an issue, a lot times this does happen. Try not to be defensive about it (that's so hard!--LOL). A couple of years ago, I had a problem and ended up crying hysterically (that's not me, at all!). I couldn't think as I was on the spot. I went home and was so mad at myself. The next day I went in and asked my supervisor if I could talk to her alone. She was so sweet. She gave me over an hour of her time and we talked. I was able to say what I wanted and to explain the situation better. She got to see an insight of me, but even more so, I got to see an insight of her. She listened to me, gave me her time--she could have said no. We didn't really know each other up to this point because I had a different supervisor up to a few months before this. Our department was separated from where she was and it was difficult. I'm not one that goes "gossiping" or "kissing up." I feel we're all grown up and the way I feel, I want to go in to work, be nice to everyone, be positive, help each other and respect each other. These are the people that we are with most of our waking moments. It's like family--we don't get to choose them, so get along--LOL. You don't have to like what they wear, what they eat, but at the same time, you have to be nice. I really hope things get better for you. There's nothing worse than what you are going through right now. It's okay to eat if you are emotional--just eat the right things (ha-ha--you didn't think I was going to say that, right?) Get the veggies cut (carrots, celery green pepper), get rice cakes, get some fruit, get some 100 calorie pack snacks and some fat free mini-pretzels. Now, remember--you have friends here, Go fill your tub up, grab a good book or put on some nice music and soak. You may not be able to control work, but you can control you! You are a great lady!  

I use to hate Sundays just knowing I had to go into my job the next day. The owner of our company was brilliant, but treated people like trash. And I was HR of the company. I have stories...lots of stories. My advice is to do the best you can to keep your chin up and get your job done. And at the same time look for another job. Life is way too short to be miserable everyday. I now work two jobs from home to make the salary I did then...dang well worth it too. :)